Knickers, Q-tips, and crunk like that...

It's amazing how puppies grow at a rapid pace. I forgot how that went. I haven't been in the prescense of a puppy in a long time, well own one for that matter. I've been used to my full grown dog for a long time. Now with two pooches in my house (thanks to my dad's obsession of getting another), everything is chaotic and tasks/chores have to be done at the right moment (to help lower the chaos).

Berkley (the puppy) is learning fast, given he is dumb, but he is catching on and following everything that Molly (the adult) does. The baby has finally learned to climb down the stairs by himself. For weeks he's been hiking up the stairs and then whine for eons until somebody would pick him up and take him down. Of course he would run away before being picked up, to make things more difficult.

The little stinker knows that my bedroom door is the easiest door to open in the whole house. Just a little nudge of the nose and BAM! it's open. He is certainly entertained in my room, more than my little sister's. She has toys everywhere, but I have clothes and shoes on my floor. Berkley is very fond of my socks, especially the dirty ones and also my underwear. The little pervert takes my underwear from my clean or dirty piles of clothing and leaves them around the house.

He is also going through the phase of sneaking in the bathrooms and digging in the trashcans to get used tissue and chew them up. I don't know if I can handle closing the door behind me every time after I'm done using it, or putting the trashcan on the counter. It's ridiculous. Why would he want to chew on snotty rags or Q-tips? Any liquid of some form that comes out of the human body is disgusting, it should not be considered tasty by any creature that lives on this planet.



Oh, I cannot end this post without the mentioning of Anna Nicole Smith. It's her time to shine for a second.

So.... She's dead, hm?

I think that's a bunch of bullshit. I'm convinced that Anna Nicole is not dead. I will stand by my statement. I honestly think that she's in hiding. Yes, hiding from the public, running from the DNA test to find out who the hell is her baby's daddy is, and from the itsy bitsy lawsuit involved with Trimspa (apparently Trimspa products don't work). There is a good argument that she was under stress with her son's death, trying to figure out what DNA means and how it will solve the confusion that is involved with her baby, persuading judges to get her late hubby's money, and figuring out all the right moments to flash her (fake) girly bits. Okay, some of those might be lies, what do I know?

The Marilyn Monroe wannabe is not dead. That is what I say.
She's probably hiding in the woods with Sasquatch or is hanging out with some cult that has sex with ghosts while they sleep.

I suppose I shouldn't be harsh. Ms. Single-Mother-Gold-Diggin'-Sex/Attention-Fiend, I hope that you are well.... wherever the hell you are.




This post is dedicated to Anna Nicole Smith.
If you really are dead, I hope you're having a happy reunion with your really really old husband and son.